Thursday, September 20, 2012

Diary of a Single Mother

Day 1: go to the airport to drop off daddy.  Little girl has explosive diarrhea that drips to the floor. After carrying her like a toxic bomb to the bathroom, using every last wipe available and yelling for the 100th time NOT to touch the public restroom toilets, we wave daddy through security.  Little girl is naked except for a disposable diaper and large hair bow.  She yells loudly, "yuv you!" and waves.  Everyone turns and stares.
We go home.

Day 2: little girl sleeps in until 8:30. We're late for her doctors appointment.  Little girl weighs 28 pounds.  It must be all that pooping.  She yells at the nurse because she can't have two prizes. I'm embarrassed.  We discuss what it means to be greedy.  They give her a lollipop.  She can't stop talking about it.  
We go shopping for a present for Boppa.  I cut my finger open on our stroller.  Stifle a curse.  Little girl hides in the racks.  I have a heart attack.  
We stop by the fountains.  I convince her not to jump in.  We go home.  Little girl cries.
No nap is taken.


Day 3: dog is whining and complaining of back pain. We call vet and they say "come on in!".  Two hours later we actually see the vet.  More medication. More bills.  Saved by the skin of my teeth with Mickey Mouse clubhouse playing on repeat on my cell phone.  Not my finest mothering moment.
We go home.  No nap is taken.
Saving Grace? Dinner with best friends at their house.
I drink wine.

Day 4:  Little girl wakes up at 5:45 am.  We do not fall back asleep. The rest of the morning is blurry.
No nap is taken. 
Saving Grace?  Going swimming with fun friends and having our favorite Mexican dinner together.

Day 5:  Little Girl wakes up with another explosive diaper.  We skip Church and spend the day resting.  She finally naps.
Gleefully head out to Target to pick up some much needed (and a few unneeded) items hoping that a little retail therapy will brighten our days.  Little girl runs amok.  See one of our mommy friends. She says I "look tired".  Ain't that the truth.
My favorite take-out place is rude to me in the drive through.  Feel like the whole world is against me.

Day 6: Attempt our normal routine.  Go to the bank to open up a savings account for the little girl.  She refers to this place as the "banket".  She gets a lollipop.  She is happy.
Head to the gym.  Train for my upcoming 5K.  I feel good.
Go to the post office on the way home.  Little girl runs amok. Hopefully packages actually make it to the intended recipients as I can't remember if I put the addresses on correctly.
No nap is taken.
I make my first whole chicken in the crockpot.
Little girl loves it.  My heart swells.
Saving Grace? Little girl pees on the potty for the second time in ever.  All of the weeks sorrows are washed away and I am filled with pride.  We have a dance party and eat gummy snacks.

Day 7:  Only got 5 hours of sleep last night.  Throw a big playdate party.  What was I thinking? Saved by my sweet and understanding friends.  All the kids leave happy.
No nap is taken.


Day 8: We head to the library.  It's a perfectly perfect morning.  We play computers.  We play letters. We have fun. We go home.
She takes a nap!
We go to the store.  My little helper helps.  We go on a scavenger hunt to find STOP signs.
We have fun.
Little girl pees on the potty 2 times before bed.  We have a dance party.  We eat gummy snacks.
My heart bursts.


Day 9:  At 9am we pick up daddy from the airport.  All is right with the world.

Not doing that again any.time.soon.

2 comments:

  1. OMG,laughed out loud HARD! I HAD days like this as a single parent, but they always seemed to end with "heart swells." Such is motherhood. I am super happy to hear of the potty breaks! Fabulous! Tell yittle girl I love her. Her fabulous mommy is LOVED VERY MUCH too.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. 3 pees on the potty today! We're on a roll.....

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